oh well

so i realized today that it's been three wonderful weeks of good. just about anyway. but the good was facade i think - the aha moments still apply. and that's wonderful. but somehow, some way while i was rejoicing over that, denial snuck back in and that's why the good has been facade like - artificial - wrong. see - i'm still tied to my past. it never went away, it just went into hiding. sorry. back to bummerville.