back to therapy

so so much to think about. went back to therapy. her answers to my pleas and questions amazed me. she said i've done the work. that i've been thru the worst. that there is nothing more to fear because i've faced everything. i'm still considering her words and her thoughts. she said that, in answer to the plea for how am i ever going to live with this - that i already AM living with it. that i already AM getting better and that the improvements WILL continue. that there is no need to fear further issues because the worst is behind us. wow. wouldn't that be incredible? what a concept. then. as if that was not enough, when i talked about sharing and how it scared me, she said lets play devil's advocate. what scares me most? not being believed? already faced that. being rejected? faced that too. issues with my husband, my brother, my mother? all of those have come up as well. and i've dealt with each one, bit by bit. what an amazing thing to consider...

update

posted a bit of my story today on an online support group. wanting so badly to be heard. but also afraid of telling. what's it gonna take to break out of this hole and get to "healed" world...? idk. does such a place exist? can i ever live with this story and not have it wretch my guts into shreds? those are hard questions. it's definitely time to go back to counseling. (sigh)