very afraid

there's this thing that happens to me - been happening since i was young. i always thought i was just weird and lacked words to describe it because it's a sensory overload thing. anyway, it's been happening again so i mentioned to my t and described it as best as i could - apparently it sounds like some kind of drug-induced problem from when i was abused or seizure related activity. i could lose driving privileges which means losing my whole irl support system including therapy... i am scared to death. aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!